Thank you for taking the time to visit our latest blog posting! RDP Sports has decided to take on a more serious topic to discuss instead of sports. Therefore, we decided to focus on the issue of domestic violence. Domestic violence should be everyone’s problem because it has affected those in various cultures, age groups, and people of all economic statuses. There are far too many people who have suffered from this type of violence, especially women. Many of these victims have been abused physically, emotionally, verbally or even sexually. The question we want answered is what are we doing to help with this type of violence because we all probably know someone that has been a victim to this type of violence.
Recently, we sat down with Karen Cooper, who was a victim of domestic violence, to discuss how she survived while being in an abusive relationship. Karen, who is a mother of two daughters, is also the author of Healing for the Hurting, which exposes her past hurts that accompany domestic violence and how she overcame them.
Our first question to Karen was, “Do you feel like society turns a blind eye to domestic violence, especially against women being abused?” Karen answered, “Yes and no. It's happening all too often. I know we don't have control of anyone's actions, but we do have control over how we react to the crime. They say high blood pressure is a silent killer, well so is domestic violence. That's because the person being abused is too scared or ashamed to say anything. They feel it's too much red tape to deal with to ensure their safety. When you hear of domestic violence, most people automatically think it’s against the women. However, Karen explains, “There was a situation recently where the man was the one concerned for his life. He took out a restraining order, and the same day the woman shot him then turned around and killed herself,” said Karen.
So, why do women seem to stay in these toxic relationship where they are being beaten, crying every night, and sometimes wishing they would die? “Every woman has her own reasons for staying with her accuser. They are in love, and they believe he's not going to do again. Then, there may be children involved. There is also mental abuse, when you've been told no one else would want you.” said Karen. A lot of times, the victims will blame themselves for the accuser’s violence. For me and most victims, other reasons for staying these horrendous relationships were the following: “I was young. My self esteem was low, and I thought he would change. After all, he said he loved me.” said Karen.
“Love is blind, and it will take over your mind. What you think is love, is truly not. You need to elevate and find.”
Karen knew that the pain she was experiencing every day was not worth staying and that she needed to make a change. So, she decided to focus on life after being in an abusive relationship: “I had to stand strong with a plan, a goal and a way out for my survival. I’m not only surviving for myself but also for my girls,” Karen commented.
After surviving domestic violence, Karen has decided to help others who are involved in abuse relationships and feel hopeless. When asked what advice she would give to women who are involved in an abusive relationship or marriage, She replied, “First, you learn how to love yourself. Know that God said you are fearfully and wonderfully made, and you are marvelous in his eyesight. Seek his face for truth and guidance. Get involved with helping others or doing something positive. If you feel you need to seek additional help, join a survivors group or seek private counsel. Most importantly, don't shy away from everyday living and forgive yourself and the person who caused you pain.”
For Karen, life is heading in the right direction. She said, “I'm stronger, not just from that experience, but from life’s situations and circumstances. Most importantly, I’m stronger from my source and inner strength, who is God.”
Karen has since been on a mission to help those who are in domestically violent relationships. She has partnered with Evangelist Karen Alston (Domestic Dialogue w/Denise campaigning) to shout out "We stand against Domestic Violence" "No More". “We will be collecting old cell phones to be delivered to current victims of domestic violence. We want every victim to have access to a phone in order to dial 911 in an emergency situation,” said Karen.
We ended the interview by asking the following question: “Who is Karen?” “I am a believer. I am beautiful. I am gifted. I am happy. I am successful . I am safe. I am accepting who I am. I am freedom. I am worthy. I am loved and I'm loving all that I am. I am a survivor!”
Please check out the link below to contact Karen and view the list of her upcoming engagements.